I hope I've really learned something from Trauma Center.

I wish I could use my stylus and/or Wiimote to stitch up real wounds. I split my face open about a month and a half ago (okay, it was just my chin, not my whole face, but still), and had to go to the emergency room. The worst part was when I would have to explain to nurses and doctors that I had split my chin on the floor in my house because I was wearing ridiculous shoes and running all over the place when I lost my balance and hit the ground so hard that my skin was pinched between the floor and my jawbone and... well, it split. That was embarassing. It was more embarassing that every single person thought I was drunk when I was, in fact, just a very sober klutz.

It wasn't as bad, though, as getting the bill for my little adventure. Over $600 for a few stitches. Ridiculous? Yes. Next time I'm sewing it up myself. I know how to sew buttons onto shirts and do needlepoint, and I'm excellent at sutures in Trauma Center, so I'm saving myself a few bucks and going for it.

$656.50 for a little thread, gauze, and tape. That better be some magical damn tape. I even went to the shadiest hospital in town in hopes that it would be kind of cheap. Roaches probably laid eggs in my wound, and it's going to cost another $650 to get my chin stitched up after it explodes with little baby cockroaches like in some urban legend.